想念

September 24, 2009

不知不觉已经来了一个多月。可是今天醒来,突然间非常想家。想念所有在新加坡的朋友。还有你。我非常庆幸认识了好几个好朋友。有一个长得很相我妹妹。我还相一位非常粗辱和懒惰女生的表弟。

其实在着的生活还不错。能自由自在一个人。可是房间里有很多人。有时也想要一点私人空间。有时太多人,太多话, 会令我一点不耐烦。那我大多时候就静静。不想有针织。有时有不同的意见,会很麻烦。

我是有非常多东西想说的。只是现在太困了。眼睛快征不开了。

晚安了大家。。。

stepping in

September 18, 2009

jitters overcame me as i was busying practising and preparing for the time going live. in the training room looking at the first batch of fellow trainees heading in suddenly made me realised that it’s going to be my turn soon my mind went blank and i could not even remember the simplest of procedures. i could not remember the last time i had this feeling. the earliest experience i had was probably during oral exams. its a weird feeling.

you can say it’s like butterflies in your stomach. but i did not experience that. the only time butterflies flew in my stomach was when i was hosting the sajc reunion dinner. i dit not expect the turnout to be so huge. and i wasn’t the best prepared. scripts were not really memorized and nerves got the better of me. i had some food before it started however my tummy started churning as soon as the time to get onto stage loomed near. those were not my stomach digesting the food. those were butterflies. i made sure i wasn’t wearing my specs that night so as not to see the crowd so clearly.

i tot i performed horrendously that night. but some people still bothered to come up to me and tell me job well done. hmmm. i wasn’t convinced. i really tot i could have done much much better. but somehow all the jokes and all the things i wanted to say just went away the moment i stepped on stage. guess i still can’t handle nerves.

the clock was ticking faster then ever. an hour passed. it did not even seem like 30mins. i still feel very unprepared. newton’s theory of relativity sucks. why must time pass faster when you don’t want it to. time is a funny thing. it does alot of thing to alot of people. and it does it thing in such a subtle way that the changes set in even before you notice it. do you not agree? have you changed? or are you thinking now that oh ya you have indeed changed in a few certain ways.

the call for the 2nd batch came. we were given 5 mins to head to the toilet to tidy up before proceeding over. i have no idea how i looked at that moment. maybe i had no expression on my face. or maybe i looked worried. what happened to the bobby pua that could stare death in the eye and laugh at it. nope. that bobby pua is definately not here with me. the air surrounding us was very still as we were waiting to be led into the action zone. heardly a word was spoken as everyone was busy trying to calm themselves down. i tried to joke, but no words came out of my mouth. so i gave up.

the journey across the road was a torture. the incoming cars were zooming about but somehow i was travelling in my own world with no knowledge of their exsistence. maybe subconsciously i was thinking of getting knocked down and escaping. but that’s just maybe. i have no idea remember? as we approached the door, my breathing started to become heavier. i started to take notice and make myself take deeper breaths. my mind was in a blank again. can you imagine a mind going blank right after it went blank? i have no idea how that works but i hope you get the idea.

i was given some time to observe. it certainly helped as i slowly remembered all the steps. time’s up and it was my turn to step in. this was no training and this time it’s live with real money involved. i sat down and announced

”Good evening, I will be your new dealer….”

journey to manila

September 16, 2009

the wheels of the metal bird lifted off from the ground and folded itself into it’s body. our safety belts were all fastened as we travelled along enclosed within it’s body. there were a few excited faces around as they were looking forward to the prospects of landing in a foreign country. most were nonchalant. most were singaporeans.

i listened closely as my neighbouring seats were chattering away about their lives before and what they expect of their lives after. i am more of an input person then output person. i tried to join in the conversation whenever i can. but just offering the basic ‘oh yea’ ‘hmmm’ most of the time. there was a time when i talked alot. however, clashes in opinions were much too often and i found myself having to explain and substantiate my point of view which was very tiring. so one day i just told myself that enough is enough. it’s not that important to let my point of view be heard. it’s good enough that i know it myself and adjust it if need be.

the smell of food floated down the aisle as the stewardess pushed the cart along. my stomach knew just when to react to the smell of food. it started to rumble and tumble. it wasn’t loud enough for my neighbours to be able to hear it but enough to make me feel uncomfortable. the journey for the stewardess to reach me took ages. i gobbled down the food when it finally reached me. it wasn’t the best but i’ve had a penchant for eating to fill my stomach rather then enjoy the food. however this habit of mine was to be tested hard during the 1 month.

the small screen a couple of seats ahead were showing a movie. i had no idea what it was but i was quite certain it starred a certain Clive Owen. Clive has a very distinct look and a certain air about him. If he beefed up abit he would probably make a good James Bond. i didn’t really pay attention to the movie screening. not the most interesting of show. my ipod was keeping me company instead. the 3 hour odd flight reached the stage where my neighbours ran out of topics to talk about and the aura of awkward silence took over. i hate it when that happens if i’m involved in the conversation. it would mean i have to think of something new to talk about. there are not many people around that you know which you would be comfortable sitting beside each other and just enjoy the other person’s company in silence.

as the journey tilted towards the destination, the legs of the metal bird stretched out again. i might not be a flying veteran, however, i would think this was one of the best landing i’ve ever had. there was hardly any rebound. it was a very smooth transition from air to land. i was very impressed.

even before the signal for all to remove the seat belts, you could hear buckles being removed and some people standing up preparing to reach out for their hand carry luggage. well, i guess some people probably has got issues with time. the inability to have the patience to wait for even a couple of minutes more. i can’t judge people like that. they might have some emergency waiting for them on the other side of immigration. so i just sat down and observed.

exiting the aircraft was a breeze when you’re one of the last out of it. and surprisingly immigration did not take too long to clear too. after collecting my lugguage i stepped out of the security clearance and was greeted with a lady in waiting, who greeted me with a

”Welcome to Manila”

Real Madrid Should Sign me Too

July 5, 2009

This video really tickles me. Considering what Julien Faubert did for the whole match. I think Real Madrid should seriously considering signing me up. I can probably show more enthusiasm and motivation then Faubert ever will.

Oh, and i will remember my teammate’s name as well.

Newcastle Utd – Clowns in Crisis

July 4, 2009

can pass off as a new Solero ad.

can pass off as a new Solero ad.

Newcastle United yesterday unveiled their new away football kit for the 2009-10 Championship season. In what can only be described as a truly awful effort – arguably one of the worst football shirts of the 21st century – it is yet another example of how the club just seem to manage to get things so wrong.

The only thing consistent about Newcastle United is their ability to mess things up on a grand scale. The two-toned yellow jersey may appeal to a small minority, but the reality is it is yet another reason for the football world in general to laugh at Newcastle United.

Most Mental Transfer Window

July 4, 2009

Mickey Signs For Manure

Mickey Signs For Manure

Having Owen Hargreaves almost permanently crocked at manure is apparently not enough for them. Now they have acquired Mickey Owen on a free to accompany Owen Hargreaves on the treatment table. However, looking at what Sir Red Nose did with Sheringham and Larsson, it might seem to be a very very shrewd move. So we shall see..

All we need now is for us to go out there and buy Ruud Van Nisterooyl and we have the craziest shit ass transfer window ever. Cheers.

Headache.

July 3, 2009

am surviving on panadol….

Song of the Night

July 2, 2009

David Holmes – Gone

Which would you give up?

July 2, 2009

1. TV

2. Mobile Phone

3. Internet

Tough choice between mobile phone and the internet this. For me, the TV would be the first to go. As we all know with the advancement of digital media, EVERYTHING is on the internet. the only downside would be losing the comfort of nua-ing on the couch and watching TV.

Internet and mobile phone. DAMN. Giving up the mobile phone would make me feel very helpless everytime i’m not anywhere with internet connection. A way to make yourself contactable would be to walk around with your laptop and logging on to skype. so people can still call you. but that’s abit overboard. or you have to roll back the years and carry with you a lil notebook where u write everybody’s number. in these day and age, i doubt many people are able to memorize ppl’s numbers.

but internet is still the boss of technology. i mean… you can watch tv on the internet. you can make calls and send sms on the internet. and it’s the feeling that you’re connected. that makes you feel at ease. so here’s the final decision. TV, Mobile Phone and then lastly the Internet.

Reader’s Digest went around with the same question. Here’s how others responded.

http://www.rd.com/your-america-inspiring-people-and-stories/which-would-you-give-up-tv-cell-or-web-around-the-world-with-one-question-international-issues-readers-digest/article141547.html

Benzema joins Real

July 1, 2009

Latest Galactico

Latest Galactico

seriously, how many players do they want to buy? after failing to get villa. now real goes and snatch benzema from right under manure’s nose. what’s next? ribery?

i’m thinking now it’s gonna be an attack consisting of benzema leading the line, kaka lining up behind him, and ronaldo and ribery raiding down the wings. even robben would be a frightening prospect but it doesn’t look like they give a shit about him now. just a few months after declaring that he is a better player then lionel messi. that’s modern football for you.

it’s an attacking set up that i can’t even pull off in football manager. ronaldo and kaka refuses to join real in the game! haha. it doesn’t matter to me if they manage to play as a team or gel as a unit. all i know is real madrid is gonna be damn fun to watch next season. just get your fat greedy hands off alonso. go away!